Parent’s Role in Dealing with Coaches

What is a parent’s role when it comes to how to deal with their coaches? What do they do when they don’t agree with a coach’s decision or the way a coach is teaching something?

One of the greatest lessons I ever learned on how to deal with coaches was from my dad and the way he handled it. He would always tell me “you’re on a team and he is the coach, you’ve got to follow what he is asking you to do. Whatever he asks you to do, you need to do.” Now, were there times when the coach would be “wrong” in the way he was teaching? Absolutely. I was fortunate enough to have a dad who played collegiate baseball, so what he was able to do with me is, if the coach was not teaching something the right way, I would be taught it correctly when I got home. My father always told me that I have to do it the way that my coach asks me to do it, but when I leave, I can do it the correct way. 99% of the time if the coach was teaching something fundamentally incorrect, and I was able to get it fixed by work I was doing at home, when I was successful in games, the coach would not say much.

The best part about this lesson is that it transcends baseball. This is applicable to the work world…let’s face it…everyone’s baseball careers will come to an end at some point, whether it is playing or coaching, it ends at some point. When it ends, your young athlete needs to know how to be adaptable in the work world because guess what…if their boss asks them to do something a certain way and they choose not to, they will get fired. When we actively go out of our way to undermine the coach in a public setting, you are doing more damage to your child than you really know. You are teaching your athlete to ignore authority if they do not agree with it.

Lastly, THEY are your athlete’s coach on the field…you might be it at home, but they are during practices and games. Too often we feel that we have the ability to question their coaches (whether it be travel or house league) instead of just trying to open a dialogue finding out why they are teaching something a certain way. You don’t see your athlete’s coach telling you how to do your job whether it be investing their money, doing surgery, selling, marketing etc. so why do you have the right to question them?

I want to finish off with a fantastic video that was sent to me from a parent when it comes to dealing with kids during a game. This has to do more with the last piece but it is too good to let slip by. Your job is to cheer your kid on from the stands. Please click on the link below to watch.


In baseball,

Trey Frahler
Director of Operations
Illinois Baseball Academy